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Isn't it funny how a first love can lead to the creation of multiple iTunes playlists?


When we fight, I listen to "wallowing."


The other 99.99% of the time, I listen to "So-Happy-I-Could-Burst."

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REAL-D Inc. Adds 14 ½ ‘Risky, But Way Cooler’ Dimensions to Previously Non-Life Threatening 3D Format


 


HOLLYWOOD, CA -- Paramount Pictures, Twentieth Century Fox, and Lightstorm Entertainment jointly announced that James Cameron’s Titanic will be re-released worldwide using REAL D’s new 17.5-D format, allowing moviegoers to be placed within the film as an observing character.


"Titanic is the perfect film for REAL D's innovative technology," said Cameron. “It adds 14 ½ necessary dimensions to the filmgoer’s experience, which completely distracts the viewer from trivial features, such as the plot”. Cameron finished his sentence by coughing what appeared to be, “Let-the-money-rain-down.”


Mr. Cameron refuses to comment on his cough.


Before the film begins, the REAL D technology, located in the viewer’s 17.5-D Eyeglasses ™, randomly places the viewer as any observing character in the film, such as a background actor or inanimate object. In the case of Titanic, seventy percent of the passengers on board drown, and all inanimate objects sink to the bottom of the Atlantic, making the REAL D experience, “kinda-sorta more risky, but way cooler feeling [than 3-D].”


Due to the precarious nature of 17.5-D, viewers must sign a consent form recognizing that the production companies will not be held responsible for any “minor or severe injuries, deaths, or unwanted side affects,” including, but not limited to, “constipation; dizziness; loss of motor functions; uncanny resemblance of movie characters; undesired change of native language (foreign film only),” or “the uncontrollable urge to serenade random bypassers with Celine Dion's ‘My Heart Will Go On’.”


REAL D Technology representative, Mr. Ralph “Go-Big-or-Go-Home” Taylor told reporters that 17.5-D is just the beginning of the REAL D experience. “Right now we’re in the process of converting classics such as Jaws and Saving Private Ryan to 17.5-D, which will hopefully direct the viewer’s attention towards surviving the experience in one piece instead of the other parts of the film, like the story and characters.”


Added Taylor, “Folks just aren’t looking for plot lines likes It’s a Wonderful Life or Citizen Kane anymore. They want a spectacle, something like a tawdry mix of Madonna’s performance at the superbowl and Texas Chainsaw Massacre. REAL D’s 14.5 extra dimensions do just that”.

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Listen      A line runs through the heart of America


 


colored people      negroes


blacks      african- americans.


people of color      Last embracing


all who are not White.


 


When it comes to race       


we do not know how to talk to one another.


 


I see a pattern running through the matrix


of white privilege      a pattern of assumptions


that were passed on to me as a white person.


 


They keep me thinking


about equality or equity incomplete      protecting


unearned advantage and conferred dominance


by making these taboo subjects.


 


Today      when sensibilities have been turned


and blatant bigotry has grown unfashionable


in most quarters     racist thoughts are given


subtler expression      making the veil


permeable and often difficult to discern.


 


We do not know where we are      and


we are not even quite sure where we have been.


 


Listen      We are a country of strangers      .      .      .

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I always said that my life was cut in two -


      the period before the war,


      and the period since the war began.


I remember everything else too,


      and it was hard, and cold, and dark.


 


 

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Woah, you were born in China?


            Sure was. I was born in a Seventh Day Adventist Hospital.


(Here we go... yes, I was born in Hong Kong on March 11th, 1996.)


 


You don’t look Chinese.


            I’m not Chinese.


(You’re right, I am Caucasian; I have no Chinese blood in my ancestry.)


 


Are your parents Chinese?


            Why would my parents be Chinese?


(Haven’t we established that I’m white?)


 


Can you speak Chinese?


            No, can you?


(Ya know, not all people in China speak Chinese.)


 


Are you an American citizen?


            Of course I am an American citizen.


(Are you kidding me? I’m not an illegal immigrant. I’ve lived in America for eight years. I’m American.)


 


You know, you can’t be president.


            I know.  

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Another mile marker and tired eyes flutter –


the endless strings of telephone lines,


cow pastures and landfills blur together


as the lullaby resonating from the spinning


axles beneath my feet croons me to sleep again.

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Thankyou for unnecessarily pointing out my spelling mistake.


I understand that it difficult to analyze my deep thoughts and motives given the sentence:


            G2G, I need to finish this stipud homework. Haha.


 


What I meant to type was:


Sorry, but I feel the need to leave this chat because I don’t like you very much due to your overall boringness and your (what I believe to be) generally sadistic humor.


 


Spelling counts, right? 

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"[Love and Art] are both simply forms of imitation" - Lord Henry Wotton, The Picture of Dorian Gray


Doodles from U.S. History, British Literature, and French Language classes. 


 

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