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I’m tired of reading others’ stories

I now want to write my own

About..what I perceived as, my first love

It began in may, I don’t know when it ended, or if it fully did.. was it even real?

While it lasted, it was

so sweet

so happy,

I could scarcely sleep

At that time, I was almost certain this could last forever

But it came to an abrupt end

Although I was the one who initiated the talk for the end

It seemed like it was coming to an end almost as soon as it began

Not because of what you did,

But what you didn’t do

As a result, I became unsure

Unsure of “love”

What it is, esp. to men

If it could withstand physical distance,

And the challenge of personal sacrifices--

Not really a challenge because of love

And past mistakes

My heart became a bit colder in some regions as a result

In the amount of affection I could pour

Out to others

And I don't like it

This thing called love and affection

Seems so often, fragile,



But at the same time,

So necessary,

So life-giving

We crave and long for it

And give it so we can receive it

It’s ironic that in certain times in life,

Ignoring, withdrawal are necessary

Being cruel to be kind

Is a harsh truth

I wish God would rescue love

In all its purity and goodness,

Beauty and joy

I know he can, just as he redeemed the world

Sometimes, we make promises

We could never or

We were never meant to


“Love without depending”

                Is it possible to give and receive love while only relying on oneself?

                Perhaps we were only meant to depend fully on One Person

                The one who formed this heart

                So that even if we leaned a little on...

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I don’t know if it’s the caffeine, the cold, or the creative impulse,

But I can’t go to sleep

All I want to do is write

I had a dream last night

Someone I hadn’t thought of in a while


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sujinee Nov 22, 2011

life can be summed up by the horizon

where sun kisses earth,

rising & appearing,

descending & disappearing

today, life is summed up by hellos and goodbyes, sunset and sunrise


A day that ends in rain

Awake but barely breathing

Wishing the past wouldn’t creep in and haunt the present

Distort the goodness

And splash in badness

Can’t even comprehend this...

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Dedicated to:

The most courageous man I’ve met

Walking with my arms pulling in my jacket closer

And head down

I was lost in the nebulous thoughts that permeated my head

When I looked up...

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sujinee Sep 29, 2011

There once was a girl

Whose name meant loyal

So she gave her loyalty

To ones who touched her heart

Spirit and mind

But the world told the girl

And the girl told herself

That she had a...

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There was a boy who did not know he was a man

Every night his head would hit his pillow with a familiar sigh

“I’m not good enough,”

He’d curse himself

The boy kept on with this until...

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