The Bearded Lady took a bow
Although she longed to curtsey,
The audience clapped louder now
And whistled without mercy.
She smiled and when she left the ring
Trapeze artists took their places,
She sat beside the monkey king
And looked up at their faces.
Maria swung and triple-flipped;
Her pretty smile unfaltered.
The bearded lady sat tight-lipped
And wished she could be altered.
The beard, though entertaining, was
A nuisance when eating
She kept her head out of the warmth
For fear of overheating.
She hated people being shocked
At her feminine gender
For just like every woman
She too was loving and tender.
On this day she did decide
To win the heart of Mike
The Ring Master who could ride
A lion like a bike.
So out the Big Top, Beardy went
And found the sword-swallower's blade
She took some foam from the clown's...
(written 6th September 2011, on the bus journey to work.)
‘Sorry. Actually no, I’m not sorry’
The fact that this was said as a joke, when some wine was spilled at a recent party I...
I’m trying to remember, but I think my name’s not Ben,
It could actually be Alice but I’ll have to think again.
Looking down I’ve got a skirt on so that must mean I’m a lady,
This is planned to be a song- Kate Nash style... but I'm not really a singer.
When I bought it
I loved it
I hoped you’d love it too
Really I bought it for you
That dress in...
I feel the footsteps behind me fall
Into a rhythm too precise
To be those of wandering crowds
I’m being followed by ghosts,
Sent to track my every move,
Cloaked in commonplace shrouds
The champagne flute longed to return to the orchestra.
But she was an alcoholic.
(An attempt to make the worst day of a guy's life vaguely humourous...)
Lisa Monroe, will you marry me?
I’m walking down Greatcastle street and it’s raining. A homeless man asks if...