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You know, sooner or later most guys start thinking about what to say when they see their dreamgirl. Yes her, that one girl, that special one that makes the sun shine only for you, the best thing that has ever happened to this planet, the one that makes life...well, you get the point.

As I am not the guy that simply walks straight up to a woman to start a conversation, I spoted that I might have a bit of a problem there when running into my dreamgirl. I mean, I could meet her in every moment right? Tonight, tomorrow, who knows? And as strongly as I believe that if it´s meant to be, well then it simply has to be, I thought, a bit of training might be really helpful, you know, just to go sure and maybe to accelerate things a bit.
So, my goal was set.  I decided, no, I was determined to change things fundamentally and to talk to every woman I normally would have been too shy to approach. Anyplace, anytime. This would become my second nature, my uberself! - Yes. Man up dude!

A few weeks passed and I actually did quite well on my mission, it took some time but I was on my way. Last friday an old friend showed up and we went to a local club to have some drinks. 
So as we were hanging out there was this blonde girl with her friends.
Don´t get me wrong, she was not "the one", but she was really hot. She was around my age, maybe 5'6 and sporting a white shirt labeled "Who is Karl L.?". She propably got that from the same store you get the "My other bag is chanel"  shoppingbag (around 19.95$, but more on that later.

On my path of enlightenment I found one thing to be always true: "Procrastination leads to ultimate frustration" which means I had to take action.
I thought of a cool conversation opener and walked straight up to her, we looked deep into each other's eyes aaaaand
... I continued walking straight to the bar!
Damn it!" I thought
"Dude why didn´t I say sth! Oh man...
Okay the night is still kinda young, there´ll be another opportunity. There must be one."
So me and my friend went back to the bar and had a beer while I kept my eyes open for another chance, and soon she was standing alone at the end of the bar. So again, I walked through the crowd like John Wayne and...
She starts talking to the barkeeper, I can´t believe it! I can´t start chatting with her while she´s talking to the barkeeper. That´s stupid.
Hm, what do I do now? Well, I´m already half way there, and I won´t go back to my bro without having talked to her, and she won´t be chatting with the barkeeper forever.
And I was right. So as soon as the barkeeper was gone I walked up to her and said my opener:
I´m Karl L.!"

Yeah, Right!
Grand Slam!
The eagle has landed! HA!

She answered:


What???! Just "hu?"
Oh no! Common, that´s just not fair. It´s too loud in here!
So I repeated
"HI..I AM KARL L..."
"Hi, I´m Verena. How asdhl gsfg"

Man this was a nightmare, not only that my totally cool opener got lost in the noise, I also couldn´t understand a word she was saying...

"I´m sorry, how was that?" I said

"I´m Verena. syfdlgkhfd...??"

"Hi..I´m Bryan...that´s a cool shirt you got there!"


I thought "maybe I should lean towards her, then I can understand something" 
and that´s what I did but then, totally unexpectable and all of a sudden...
it just happened to us!
We crashed, or actually our heads crashed.
Oh my god, I just gave her a headbutt!
Man, that was not good.
"I´m really sorry" I said
She grabbed my arm and said "hlkhfgyld"
Of course,
I have no idea what she said.
So, this conversation was pretty much over after that and I went back to my friend. Technically you could say that she gave me the headbutt, or that it was a draw at least, but I guess she was giving me the props.


A cool, little intro. Enjoy

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Hey guys, I made this song & video for the cbs contest (how i met your mother). It´s a nice cool song so I thought I should post it here. So there you go, feel free to remix it. You can download the track here:

Of course you can also vote for me in the contest! Highly appreciated! So click this link and hit the like button - and tell everyone about it!

Thanks and have fun!


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Marvin Hoffman feels blue. After years of secretly having a crush on June Winters he finally had a shot at love when going out on a date with her. But destiny didn’t consider his almost pathological shyness which completely sabotaged any possibilities for any conversation or even romance. Hard times for Marvin, it’s a cold and heartless world he lives in, and it completely freezes soon after he sees June hanging out with a Norwegian exchange student called Alfred!

Marvin is the archetype of a friendly stoner in his early twenties. Always helpful, often late and easily confused. More than ever since he found his passion for conspiracy theories. Despite the fact that he is superb at drawing, he studies accounting and mostly hangs out with his friends Fred and Kara, who also share his passion for smoking weed. Together they founded the Dope Enjoyers Association(DEA), a professional league for competitive weed smokers which has an almost daily schedule. One night, after a hard competition and a lonely walk home, Marvin reads an offer to work as medication tester for a new antidepressant. Still hurt from seeing June with Alfred and seriously high, but also determined to change for good Marvin signs up for the program.

A few weeks pass. Marvin has entered the second stage of the medication, when he meets a guy called Dean. Marvin is fascinated by him and they instantly become good friends. Dean is a sleek womanizer and top secret agent who is living the most exciting live Marvin can imagine. For a reason: None of them knows that Dean is the side effect of Marvin mixing his weed with the medication. He is an imaginary friend and therefor exactly living what Marvin expects to be a contemporary lifestyle for the secret agent of today. And Marvin has high standards! As Dean gets annoyed by Marvin constantly whining about June, he offers him a mentorship. By simply following his manly and widely tested techniques Marvin should be back on June’s radar in no time. Dean’s plan is quite simple yet brilliant. He explains to Marvin that ladies aren’t attracted to men, no, as a matter of fact they are attracted to a man surrounded by lots of attractive women! So all Marvin has to do is to meet dozens of women and June won’t be able to resist. Of course Dean knows how to do this! Marvin agrees to getting mentored, obviously clueless that Dean’s knowledge about attracting women is exclusively acquired from Marvin watching music videos or action movies.

Although most of the techniques don’t work, the plan surprisingly has a positive effect on Marvin’s life. His trust in Dean’s knowledge is so strong that he becomes more outgoing and confident, which also gets noticed by June - and Alfred! On the other hand Dean, who thanks to Marvin’s new found confidence and vivid fantasy by now has started dating and fighting dark forces simultaneously, struggles in his world with a forbidden love to a Cuban spy called Soraya. All those years they needed to keep it secret to stay cloaked, so he left her behind. Finally he gets a chance to see her again, and finds himself, in a trap set up by Soraya’s evil uncle Carlos!

Dean suddenly realizes that his life, the world he lives in is only a heavily leveraged version of Marvin’s life and that every decision and experience Marvin takes dramatically affects him. He now knows, only if Marvin and June fall in love, he and Soraya can have a chance. But Dean also knows, that his existence, his world is completely build up on the fact that Marvin is unhappy and therefor needs him. If Marvin and June fall in love, Marvin will be happy. Marvin won’t take the pills anymore, and Dean will disappear..

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