Once there was a boy named Linus. Linus and his family lived in a cottage near a great forest. Every day Linus would run about and play in the edge of this forest while his father worked in a modest lumber yard nearby. He longed to go exploring deep into the forest, but he was never allowed to go so far that he could not hear the great saws at the lumber yard where his father worked. So Linus loved the dark hours of the night, because during those hours he could sneak into the back yard and pretend that he was exploring the dark heart of the forest.
One night while he was rambling through the make-believe forest in his back yard, Linus accidentally stumbled over the boards and fell into the well. A strange feeling came over him as he fell, and in a moment Linus suddenly felt so light and airy that it seemed he was not falling at all. He never remembered hitting the bottom of the well, and in fact he never remembered anything at all about his life before he fell down the well. He knew that he was different now than he was before, but he couldn't remember what he had been, or even that his name had been Linus. He asked himself again and again, what is my name? What is my name? After what seemed like a very long time, he thought he remembered that his name was Nilus. He was relieved that he could remember this name, and with a sigh he lay down and fell quickly to sleep right where he was.
When he awoke the next day, Nilus squinted into the air above him. As his eyes came into focus, he saw a great web of branches high above him, and a thick cover of leaves that blocked out every ray of the daytime sun. He realized that he must be deep in the heart of the forest that he had always longed to explore. But despite Nilus's excitement at this opportunity to begin his exploration, he found it very difficult to spring to his feet as he normally would. And when he looked to see what might be wrong with his feet, he was startled to see that he didn't seem to have any feet or legs at all. In fact, as he studied his whole body he noticed that he didn't recognize anything he saw. It seemed that he had lost almost all of his shape, and instead he had some sort of indefinite, ethereal form. What Nilus did not yet realize was that he was no longer a boy at all, but instead he was now a forest gloam.
The forest gloams were a mischievous gang of shadows that lived in the darkest depths of the forest. And even though gloams were known to live in all kinds of habitats all over the world, a forest like this one was considered to be the sort of utopia that any gloam would wish for. Not long after Nilus began wandering through the forest he met a forest gloam named Pinwisp. Pinwisp was very kind, and he explained to Nilus who the forest gloams were and what life was like as a forest gloam. At first Nilus was skeptical, because he'd always heard that gloams were very sad and very sluggish. But Pinwisp explained that forest gloams were different from all other gloams because the forest gave them the kind of environment where a gloam could thrive and live in contentment. As Nilus met more and more forest gloams he gradually became convinced that life with his new shadowy friends could be as exciting as he ever hoped life could be.
So Nilus loved life as a forest gloam, and over time he was able to explore the entire forest and meet all of the other forest gloams and form very special friendships with them. During the daytime all of the gloams would gather in the dark heart of the forest where none of the sun's rays could enter. But at night the gloams would often scatter throughout the forest, even to the very edges of the forest. Often Nilus and Pinwisp would spend much of the night in that edge of the forest where a boy named Linus had lived with his family. This little area felt special to Nilus, and so he was drawn there again and again without knowing the reasons why. And during the dark hours of the night, Nilus and Pinwisp loved to play their favorite game called Falling Down the Well. They loved the bundles of flowers arranged around the well and the remnants of old petals scattered nearby. They loved the beautiful stone with special markings that was planted near the well. They loved the wooden fence that encompassed the well and the special markings on the wooden planks all around that fence. They loved the thick new boards nailed firmly into place over the top of the well. But most of all, and even to this day, they love to shriek and squeal as they rise and fall and rise and fall again in the darkness of the stone-lined cylinder of their beloved old well.
- Getting to Know Your Narrator VO
I love RECording voice for this kind of writing, it's so much fun for me. So there's no way I could resist taking a shot at the Getting to Know Your Mom project.
Yo mama's so dumb that she thinks Verdi composed Der Ring des Nibelungen.
Yo mama's so dumb that she thinks Antonioni made films with just as much transhistorical interiority as Bergman's films.
Yo mama's so dumb that she sees no similarities between the "Scherzo" movement in Tchaikovsky's Piano Sonata in C-sharp minor and the "Spring" "Largo" movement from Vivaldi's Four Seasons.
Yo mama's so dumb that when anyone mentions historically significant librettists she only talks about Metastasio.
Yo mama's so dumb that she dismisses the artistic value of Greek vases because she thinks they actually originated in Etruria DESPITE the preponderance of Greek inscriptions.
Yo mama's so dumb that she thinks American Abstract Expressionism was just a politically-motivated response to Socialist Realism because that was the aesthetic preference in Soviet-era Russia.
In a solitary room two children stand facing each other in silence. Their arms are outstretched towards each other, physically holding the darkness at bay to keep it from spilling into the world they guard. They are engaged in a constant struggle to balance the darkness between them as though they were metallic barriers opposing some unseen magnetic force. Young Olaf and Gelsomina were born to this unrelenting task, and they are locked into the darkness they hold between them. They are engulfed in the shroud they are sworn to keep at bay. Their small determined limbs circumscribe a gentle circle that conducts the surging current of night between them without letting it seep past them into the world that they have never yet seen with their own eyes.
A nightingale is perched in the east corner of the cramped room. She sings songs of sustenance that nourish the children as they perform their duties. The nightingale's song is their food and their sleep, their drug and their conversation. The bittersweet song serves as the umbilical cord for the children, and it permits them to be devoted ceaselessly and tirelessly to their duties. The wordless melodies paint pictures for Olaf and Gelsomina of the world that they protect and the people that inhabit it. The nightingale's voice is the most beautiful sound anyone from the outside world has ever known. But the nightingale has such profound respect and admiration for these two children that she only ever sings her songs for them.
In the west corner of this solitary room stands a giant hourglass. According to the legends portrayed in the nightingale's song, the hourglass measures the time that the children must continue to perform their duties. If and when the sands ever run out, the children will be freed from their lives of service so that they may live as honored heroes in the outside world. The nightingale's song foretells of another pair of children who will be born with the same gifts that Olaf and Gelsomina use to keep the darkness contained. It takes a great deal of strength to resist the urge to watch the sands trickle down in the giant hourglass, almost as much strength as it takes to fend off the menacing midnight fog that requires the children's full devotion.
Days pass unsuspectingly in the outside world as the sands continue to trickle slowly down, and the nightingale continues to sing, and young Olaf and Gelsomina continue to make their stand in the secret, solitary room of their young existence.
This is an expansion on mushr's wonderful ideas presented a few days ago in her RECord called The Century (volume one). I introduced the nightingale into that setting she created and elaborated on some of the other ideas. It has been too too long since mushr and I last swapped ideas through RECords like these.
- Reading the Twenty-Second Letter of Henry Adam ...
Here is my first reading from the letters of Henry Adam Wood - this one of the 22nd by tootwofoursquare. I'm definitely making plans to read more of these letters - I'm a big fan of this collaboration.
Two customers are waiting to be helped in a small shop.
SECOND IN LINE: Excuse me?
FIRST IN LINE: (silence)
SECOND IN LINE: Excuse me?!?!
FIRST IN LINE: I... sorry, I don't work here.
SECOND IN LINE: Are you Bo Jack?
FIRST IN LINE: (anxiously looks for help)
SECOND IN LINE: I'm speaking to you ma'am, are you Bo Jack?
FIRST IN LINE: No, I'm not... I'm actually a... male. A man. I'm not Bo Jack, I'm waiting to be helped.
SECOND IN LINE: (cutting him off) Hello! Is somebody here?!
POP: (emerging) Hello, yes! I'm Pop, may I help you with something?
SECOND IN LINE: Finally! A little service! Actually, this mailman was here first.
FIRST IN LINE: I'm not...
POP: Hello good sir, welcome to Bo Jack's Lollipop Repair, may I help you with something?
FIRST IN LINE: I'm not a... mailman. I'm just a... regular... man.
POP: Isn't that wonderful!
SECOND IN LINE: He told me he was a mailman.
FIRST IN LINE: I didn't mean... I was just trying to say that I'm not a... you called me ma'am so I...
POP: Can't I help you with something, sir?
FIRST IN LINE: Yes of course, sorry. I'm a producer for the midday show on channel 7. From time to time we...
SECOND IN LINE: Is this an exposé on a rat problem?
FIRST IN LINE: Well no, this... rat problem?
POP: We don't have a rat problem.
SECOND IN LINE: Last week you did an exposé on the rat problem at Shaky's Science Center.
FIRST IN LINE: Oh, you saw that! That was one of my segments.
SECOND IN LINE: It was awful. (to Pop) It turned out there wasn't a rat problem, those were Shaky's own pet rats. He uses them to demonstrate science.
POP: Oh dear.
FIRST IN LINE: There was a lot of... I'm not so sure... I'm still working on getting to the bottom of that incident.
SECOND IN LINE: Oh you're at the bottom all right. How much longer is this going to be?
FIRST IN LINE: Excuse me?
POP: (to Customer 2) Please bear with us just one more moment. (to Customer 1) Sir, I'm afraid that Bo Jack isn't available, he was recently hospitalized due to a frightful welding accident.
FIRST IN LINE: Oh dear, I'm so sorry! Was he... well... was it work-related?
SECOND IN LINE: Are you asking if he was welding a lollipop?!
POP: Oh sir! No! I assure you, we use only the finest glues in our repair process!
FIRST IN LINE: Oh thank goodness! For a moment I... did you say that you use glue to repair these lollipops?
POP: Oh yes sir! It's a powerful industrial adhesive, guaranteed to make the lollipop stronger than ever!
FIRST IN LINE: Really? Is this industrial adhesive safe to eat?
POP: Oh, sir! We strongly recommend against attempting to eat a lollipop once it has been through the repair process. A repaired lollipop is meant to be a keepsake, a memento, a souvenir if you will!
FIRST IN LINE: Oh I see. Of course! Ha,now that you say it, it seems ridiculous... repairing it and then eating it. (turns to Customer 2) I guess I'd have to be a real... horse's ass, wouldn't I?
SECOND IN LINE: (sheepishly opens her mouth) Not necessarily.
And So It Begins
If you're interested in remixing this, the higher resolution can be found here:
- Capture the Flag Q1 Commentary only track
Here's some voiceover commentary for the first quarter of the Capture the Flag game. This track is synced up with the video rough cut, so the first 16 seconds of the track are silent. I'll also upload a video version showing what it sounds like over the video, once I get it to render.
- Capture the Flag Q2 Commentary only track
Here is the voiceover commentary for the second quarter of the Capture the Flag game. The track is synced up with the video rough cut, so the first 10 seconds of the track are silent. The video version of this is rendering now, I'll upload it in a few.
- Capture the Flag Q3 Commentary only track
This is the voiceover commentary for the third quarter of Capture the Flag. The track is synced up with DTA's video rough track, so the first 18 seconds of the track are silent. I'll upload a video version of this as per usual.
- Capture the Flag Q4 Commentary only track
This is the voiceover commentary track for the fourth quarter of Capture the Flag. The track is synced up with DTA's video rough cut of the game, so the first 26 seconds of this RECord are silent. The upload of the video version is forthcoming... or should I say FOURTHcoming??? (Editor's note: no I shouldn't)
I just uploaded a voice-only track with my voiceover commentary for the first quarter of the Capture the Flag game, and here is what the video rough cut looks like with that commentary track on top of it. The commentary-only track can be found at http://www.hitrecord.org/records/1400053.
I uploaded a voice-only audio RECord with second quarter commentary, and here is what the video rough cut looks like with the commentary on top of it. The commentary-only track can be found at http://www.hitrecord.org/records/1401547.
- Reading you the story - Major Boredom and Gener...
This is just a story about a guy thinking out loud about forming a family band.
So that's it, then. We'll go to the five-and-dime, buy matching vests and top hats, and form a family band. We'll take to the road in my four-door sedan and shlep around whatever instruments we can keep strapped on top. Maybe I could even invent a new strap designed especially for family bands, and that will help support us financially while we're in the "learning how to play musical instruments" phase. We'll only play in cities that end in -ville or -anooga, and make records that can only be purchased at truck stops. In between songs we can take turns telling stories about my childhood memories. In fact, that'll be the most important part of the show. I'll tell the story about the lighting factory that was across the street from the drive-in theater in my hometown, and how I wasn't familiar with the word "lighting", so I just imagined that the sign was misspelled, and so I thought that it was actually a factory that made lightning. And I was so worried about the lightning factory being so close to the drive-in theater, because what would happen if some of the lightning escaped from the factory and struck the big drive-in screen, because maybe nobody would know that it was real lightning, they might think it was just part of the movie, and then everybody at the drive-in would be killed by lightning. But I thought my uncle was so cool because he worked at the factory, so his job was to help make lightning, plus he lived in a house that was right next to a junk yard, so he could see piles and piles of wrecked cars anytime he wanted to, and I wanted to be just like him. And the whole time I'm telling this story, if it's my turn to tell the story, the rest of you could be stacking our top hats into a pyramid, and that could be our thing, since no other family bands build top hat pyramids during their shows. And after we become famous and wealthy, we'll play fewer and fewer shows, and make fewer and fewer records, and eventually we won't be a band anymore, we'll just be a family. But we can still drive to our favorite cities in my four-door sedan, but it would be more like a vacation, and people would still recognize us because we would still be wearing our vests and top hats, and they would say hi to us when we eat in the restaurants we ate in as a family band, but now we'd just be a family. And even if we never become that successful as a family band, it wouldn't be so bad if we eventually had to get other jobs and stop being a family band, because we could still be a family. It wouldn't bother us, because eventually we might forget we were ever in a family band, we would just think of ourselves as a family, except when we see some of our records when we go to truck stops, and then we would tell stories about the time when we were a family band. Then we would leave the truck stop and go home, and go back to just being a family.