Crack and Field
Peers: "Wow, look at Robbie go!"
Narrator: Robbie's peers at school say he runs like lightning.
Robbie: "Hey what are you guys doing with those funny-looking pipes?"
Narrator: But then Robbie trades his baton for a crack pipe.
Grandma: "Robbie! Are you a homicidal maniac?"
Robbie: "No grandma, I'm a junkie hooked on crack cocaine! Now shut up and give me all of your money!"
Narrator: His school chums thought he'd be a winner at the State Finals.
Robbie: "My lungs are on fire!"
Narrator: How could they know his whole life was running IN A DEAD HEAT???
School Chum: "Robbie's not a trackhead, he's a crackhead!"
Narrator: CRACK AND FIELD!
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