She was the heaviest that she had been
Because her words now carried so much weight.
(remix with gregoryrowlerson)
a hang up.
caused by poverty.
caused by gluttony.
the reasons are found on the inside.
the fat is worn on the outside.
(i'm heaviest that i've been. i have my reasons) :)
Ive struggled with weight my entire life, I’ve been heavy, I’ve been fairly thin, but mostly I have been heavy. Or to call it politely “full-figured” or “curvy,” I’m unsure of how I feel about either title but do like both of them a little better than “plus size” or “fat.”
There are plenty of issues that come with being “curvy.” First of all, finding stylish clothing as a plus size woman is an epic journey, and I do not mean that in a good way- there are more clothing choices than there were when I was a kid growing up in the 80s and 90s, but check out any American mall, 98.9% of the clothing (and that’s my best guestimate) is for thin women. More particularly, thin, young women. At 35, I have 4 or 5 places I can shop for clothing that doesn’t make me look matronly. And they’re all expensive. '
Sadly, people treat you with more respect and kindness when you are thin. “Full figured” women, don’t even bother to step into a Victoria’s Secret. You’ll be treated to snickers and sneers, by employees and customers alike, if you’re not given the cold shoulder completely. But it’s not just there. I once heard a story about a girl who went into a different well-known store, and wanted to try on an outfit that was on the mannequin, asking a worker to take it down. The worker refused to, telling the girl something to the effect of “why do you want to see that? It clearly won’t fit you.” Needless to say, the girl left in tears
Secondly, there are issues with men, in my experience many of them won’t give a “full-figured” woman a second glance. And if they do, it's to comment on size. I’ve often heard statements about women from men such as “She’d be really pretty if she lost 30 pounds” or worse comments like “fat bitch” or the amplified “fat ass bitch,” and those are on the mild spectrum. But it’s not just full-grown males, my own 8 year old nephew has called me “fat” and “too big”, and laughs. I have to admit it hurts.
It hurts mostly because it brings back memories of being taunted relentlessly at school on a daily basis as a kid for being overweight. This is before “bullying” was a buzz word, and the watered down “teasing” was in full effect. Let’s be real, being verbally abused back in the day was not taken as seriously as it is now. I was called “ugly,” “disgusting,” “dog, ” “bubble butt” to list a few nicknames, and I felt like the biggest troll in the world. I still have issues with self-esteem that date back to my tormented childhood. Back then, teachers were fully aware of what was going on, and not one of them intervened. But it wasn’t just verbal abuse, I had notebooks stolen from me, and was locked into bathroom stalls with the lights cut out one 2 separate occasions at least.
I could go on about “fat” discrimination, but I’ll end here for now
CALLING ALL ARTISTS! We are starting a collaboration RE: Dreams, which will be a potential theme for one of our Season 2 episodes - RECord your thoughts, write a story, draw a picture, or make a song regarding this theme.
EVERYONE: Contribute a Text Record with your Ideas for segments for this potential TV Episode.
EVERYONE W/ A CAMERA: RECord a testimonial regarding this theme.
Q&A: RECord yourself on video answering these questions:
- "Do your Dreams ever have meaning? Please give a specific example."
- "What is a memorable Nightmare you have had? Be specific."
- "What is a memorable Dream you have had? Be specific."
- "What are your Recurring Dreams? Do they give insight into your daily thoughts, fears and anxieties?"
- "Are you living 'The Dream?' Also, what does that phrase even mean?"
WRITERS: Contribute a piece of Writing regarding this theme.
MUSICIANS: Contribute a piece of Music regarding this theme.
ANIMATORS: Contribute an Animation regarding this theme.
ILLUSTRATORS: Contribute an Illustration regarding this theme.
GRAPHIC DESIGNERS: Contribute some Graphic Design regarding this theme.
They carried their hearts inside of a shoe box,
CALLING ALL CINEMATOGRAPHERS, PHOTOGRAPHERS, & ILLUSTRATORS! We're gonna begin to develop the visual world for THIS "PINE CONE BALLET" ANIMATIC by JasonAngelone - contribute your video footage, photography & illustrations!
CINEMATOGRAPHERS: RECord video footage of environments that could be Backgrounds or Backdrops for the Pine Cone Dancers. Refer to THESE STORYBOARDS as a guide for your shots.
PHOTOGRAPHERS: Take Photos of Pine Cones from all different angles against either a solid Green or White Background.
ILLUSTRATORS: Create Character Designs LIKE THIS for the Pine Cone Dancers.
This is a sketch that may potentially be my school's grad mural, hence some of the elements included such as the date, etc.
**Resourced are some inspirations for this drawing
this is an illustration for my idea for an animated piece about Darkness as a woman. this is a shot of her hugging the world goodnight. I hope you guys like or find something useful with it...:) if anyone wants to REmix this, then please go ahead it would be cool :) resourced my idea below in case you want to take a look <3
After note OH MY GOODNESS, I HAVE JUST REALISED THIS IS MY 100TH RECORD! I really love hitRECord and it feels amazing to have shared 100 pieces of my work here, (man, that went quick) thank you so so much hitRECord x
Here is the poem i wrote inspired by this concept:http://www.hitrecord.org/records/1589081