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Epocadofim-1296463
Released 2012-07-12 18:38:54 -1000
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The worst part is that when I'm working on other stuff, not only am I not getting my own stuff up here, but I'm missing everyone else's awesome new stuff here. That in mind, I demand at least three copies of my self be made so that they may monitor stories, collabs, and audio visual mediums being posted for the site at all times. Then, they will get together, and organize a daily briefing for me, like the president gets, so I can know what stuff the second set of clones should be remixing. Given, at this point, I'll need them to create a third set of clones, whose sole operating function will be creating rooms with stable time loops in which the first and second sets of clones (the A team, as it were) can reach maximum efficency. Since I'll still have to be working on my thesis till the all too near spring of next year, I'll need the clones to send another me back from the future. It is my operating, and I like to think ballsy and optimistic assumption that by this time aging will have been cured, and older, half-cybernetic me will just be able to watch cartoons and movies, go to dance parties, and learn the fine art of zen gardening.


Ergo, at this point, one (me, actually, I'm the one in this case) assumes that hitRECord will have not only become the dominant power on earth, but will have split the world into two halves during the first ever entirely IP and remixing based civil war, the first global hitREVolt, which will start through the escalating rivalry between two identical time duplicates of Joe, who will have been created in 2016 during a freak superluminal grandfather clock/lightning fishing accident on the set of a movie filming in eastern Russia. As such, half of my clones will be taken, and dealt off accordingly to both hitR (western hemisphere) and ECord (eastern hemisphere), as will be the technique applied to all recorders at this time, in the interest of fairness. The 18 of us who do not have clone armies at the time will be cloned so that the division can be fair, and, in accordance to the Equal Clone Rights act of 2015 (all of this stuff is going to happen sooner than you think once the higgs boson flies around the world on June 4th of next year and gives everybody teleporters) the clones and the originals will not be differentiated between. With the cloning process being done entirely by teleporter based quantum tunneling techniques, it's debatable who the original is in the first place.


 


Now, we're at around 2045 at this point, and things are going crazy. This is also because, due to a mass quantum stupidity tornado in northern Canada, about two thirds of the world will have not experienced the span of time between 2014 and 2043. As a result, when Joe and also Joe are forced to create a draft for singer/songwriters and book editors, respectively, it will cause Canada to stage a revolt, making it the first independent nation since a global government was installed to bail out Greece during the MQS Tornado. Note also the the MQS Tornado started in both 2023, 2014, and actually the last thursday of 2011. They're dumb like that, MQSTs.


I completely forgot what I was originally talking about...


 


Oh yeah, time, that's right. I wish I had more time to see all the work that everyone else is doing, but alas, I still keep getting dragged away by other work. So all I ask of you all is this:


hitRECord community, keep being awesome, so awesome that when one of your number can't be around they feel so bummed about it that they have to imagine a world so crazy that Joe is fighting Joe with an army of clones a piece. I'll try and fail to catch up when I can. Till then, TTFN.

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