This one night I was sleeping lying asleep in my bed of softness, with my sheets made of satan. They were so soft like my body. An owl or something was hooting out my window b/c all animals love me.

Then a shadow came through my window.

I was scared at first b/c wtf.

The shadow slowly took on a form… .the form of a HUMAN. It was a man and he was naked save for a scarf which he was wearing in that way where you double it up and then put the two ends through the loop. (Because that hot when boys do that LOL!)

he had on black chipped nail polish. And eyeliner. He padded softly on his bear feet over to my bed.

I said Who are you what do you want?????

He said…….I want only you my beauty.


(Hang on I have to make up more. Hang on! BRB!)




He was like,

You are my angle of light. You’re skin is so sleek and porcine. Ur hair is like a piece of straw. Your eye color is like the color of a pool or something.

He was pretty hot to i have to say, his skin was soft like a rose petal, he did not have zits or back hair lol. He didnt even wax he was just born like that. 

My heart which had been so empty and broken, spat on and kicked and torn up like a piece of bacon, started to mend just by me looking at him.

I stared deep into his cerulean eyes. His eyes caressed me. (Not like they came out of his head and touched me but I mean he looked at me like in a really nice way.)

He whiped back the sheets!!! Exposing my sleek beautiful nubile body. IT WAS TIME!!!

I can no longer live another second without your touch!!! I said.

Then he put his hands into my flower, which was lost forever!!! My nipples were like roses, I mean the flower part not the stem or anything. Where-as HIS nipples were like two slices of pepperoni sitting on his chest. I was hungry for him!!!

We started doing it. It was soooo good, soooo intense. Then I felt his hot hot tears hitting my cheek like warn wet rain, Why are you crying, I said. We are banging, don’t cry, your ruining it.

“O my love” he told me “It because my soul was so broken and black and dead and I was merely a husk of a former shell of a man! Up until I stick it in you!! But now I am healed, healed by the healing light of your crotch!!

He wiggled a few times and then he came.

I was like That’s it? OMG.

Then like a shadow he stole out of my bedroom window. He floated away light as a feather carried away on the sweet sweet night air.

All that he left behind was his scarf.

I am going to wear it forever till the day I die. Even in the shower and when its hot out and such.




NO BECAUSE THERE IS ANOTHER CHAPPIE: http://www.hitrecord.org/records/754224


THREE: http://www.hitrecord.org/records/764237


FOUR!! http://www.hitrecord.org/records/772558


FIVE  http://www.hitrecord.org/records/787020

  AND SIX WHICH IS TEH END http://www.hitrecord.org/records/1069444



HEAR IN FACT IS AN WHOLE ALBUM OF NOOKIE http://www.hitrecord.org/albums/49906