As painful as it was to walk away, I continued to walking down the dark to my apartment. I didn’t want to waste money on a cab and I didn’t want to take the offer of a ride from him. I needed to get away, far away, from him. I can’t give in to him. My heart and my brain are at war, and I couldn’t bring them to peace. The streets were filled with dark shadows of the downtown buildings. They stood tall as I tried to appreciate the beautiful historical architecture. But darkness covered the building like a winter coat, and my thoughts echoed even louder. Even the wind was taking sides with my heart, as it whispered in my ear as if it had a voice. I could have sworn it said, “Turn away… go back to him”. I swear the walk to my apartment seemed to take longer than I remembered. As I turned the corner, my apartment was in view. Situated in an old beautifully structured building, my place was my fortress, my protection, and no one could break it down. I stayed on the very top so I had roof access with the added expense to my rent, of course. But thinking about my apartment eased my mind because I was so close to my safe zone.
I entered the entrance and everything was quiet. It felt like the world was empty and I was the only person left. Even my thoughts were quiet. I walked up the stair my apartment, trying to be as quiet as possible, but the wooden stairs creaked. I heard a door cry as a tenant eyeballed me walking up the creaking stairs. My face scrunched up and my nostrils flared.
“What the fuck are you looking at lady?” I snapped
She slammed her door loudly, probably waking up more tenants.
“I can’t stand nosy people. Fuckin look,” I mumbled, “and go back in the house.”
I finally made it to my floor and the clicking sound of my key unlocked the door was the most pleasant noise I heard all day. As the door slung open, I admired my apartment a little more. I threw the key on the table and started to strip. I didn’t care about the clothes lying on the floor; I just wanted to be in my tub. I walked through the living room, through my bedroom, and finally to my bathroom. I decided to take a shower instead. The warmth of the water hitting my naked body gave me chills. As the water hit my face, I saw a vivid picture of his lips connecting to mine.
“Cytherea, snap out of it!” I yelled at myself.
I jumped out of the shower to a knock on my door. I checked the time to make sure I wasn’t going crazy.
“Who the hell is knocking at my fuckin door at this time of night?” I yelled. No answer. I looked through the peep hole. My heart sank and my stomach fluttered toward the ceiling. Then anger set in. I slung the door open…