“You, sir, are a fork.”

“I'm not a fork.”

“Don't be absurd. You, are in fact, a fork.”

“You're mistaken.”

“I can assure you, you are a fork.”

“Am not.”

“Let me ask you; do you have prongs sticking from your head? Are you used as an eating utensil?”

“Yes.”

“Then you’re a fork.”

“No.”