I drew a picture of the Turnip Head awhile back and this is the only way I am able to RECord right now. Gaby has helped me a lot lately so I am grateful for her. I will try this again but until then, I hope you enjoy the latest version. KEEP READING PLEASE-I got a story that follows! Since it's a Text, figured I'd write a story.

So here I am, just hoping to get noticed by a Higher Power....Mery Christmas!

                   ******STORY*********

This Turnip, called Fred was on a mission. His family meembers were the average human. So at 36 he had an apiphony: Something was seriously wrong. "I am on a mission: Fred said one foggy morning. "I am going to have an argument with God" Figure out why I deserved to be born looking like a Turnip."

So Fred dressed to impress and got in his car to drive straight; straight forward that is. His girlfriend Gabby called his cell and Fred put her on speaker and said, "I'm sorry I'm blowing off our Bridge playing date, my Darling Dear, My agenda has changed. I'm dreadfully sorry."

So, Fred, stopping at a Red Light, explained his delimma. "God is more important than me? I love you just the way you are, Frederick, Darling."

"Gabby, I wish not to have children who are half human-half turnip. It's just not in the cards for me."

Just then in the middle of the Freeway, a large sign read: "GOD STRAIGHT AHEAD 3.2 MILES." Fred's car-a Lambordini-screetched along the road as he made rather sharp turn. "Gabby, either I get plastic surgery or I continue my mission to God. I will call you later, my love. I must focus on the road."

The Turnip Man hung up as he came to a large building, almost the size of a hospital, parked the car and got out.

"Do you have an appointment with God, Sir?" the rather petite secretaty with a pineapple for a head asks, nonchellantly.

"I am Fred and I need a new head."

"One moment please," replies the secretary, removing herself from the swinging chair and heads down the hall.

Suddenly, as Fred drums his fingers along the desk a man who was glowing-with a choir who sung as He walked and stopped singing as he came to ahault-looks at Fred with his Turnip head and asks, "Welcome to my ever growing humble abode. You must be Fred. Mary and Joseph told me you were coming."

"Smart people considering I've never met them," Fred said with sarcasom. "In order to ask my Fiancee' for her hand in marriage, I need a new head, please."

God walks with Fred to another room where there are glass tables. "What sort of head would you prefer, Fred?"

Fred walks to the array of glass table where Fred was mystified. Fred was puzzled and had not a clue what to do. Fred became overwhelmed.

There was a Carrot for a head....there was a potato for a head......there was an avicado for a head...even a raddish for a head.