Feedback Collab
October 15, 2011
Looking for feedback on your work? Contribute it here. Anyone kind enough to GIVE feedback, please join in as well! :-)
(any type and size... videos, texts, images ,etc.)
... don't forget your elephant skin!
PS: I will rotate through all submissions. Maybe a reviewing structure could be for those wanting to GIVE feedback to pick whatever is featured. Just a thought.
Dess had been taught to live her life fully
But with no rush, with no hurry:
“Don't see the world, watch it closely.
It takes some time to know it truly.”
For fifteen years Dess honored this creed
And learned to observe as her parents did.
But in the end it was too much to take
And her savant heart was about to break.
“We die as we lived” her father said
And she knew for sure she wanted to be dead.
So she made her choice and then pushed the door
Of the now famous “suicide store”.
Sadly the storekeeper was not surprised to see her entering,
And a look to her face told him she had been crying.
Dess approached the desk, watched him in the eye
And whispered: “Please sir, help me die.”
As he remained quiet, Dess pulled herself together:
“Have you got anything slow and painful, sir ?”
Her life had been vivid and wisely lazy
And so her death would be.
But the storekeeper knew better than giving her what she thought she wanted
For seeing the world as it is would one day make her enchanted.
So he took a deep breath and replied, acting cold:
“Yeah, young lady: growing old”.
_____
I need help! I really want to make something out of this suicide thing, but I'm not a poet, and... well, I'm French, kinda speaks for itself x')
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Nightmare Romance (Low-Res...
by chariot13
Date: October 23, 2011
Hits: 752
Hearts: 39
Heartrate: 6% -
Shelter (Revised 23/11/11)
by Emma Conner
Date: November 23, 2011
Hits: 127
Hearts: 16
Heartrate: 13% -
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An Aquarius, A Libra, and ...
by melismayhem
Date: October 16, 2011
Hits: 273
Hearts: 6
Heartrate: 3% -
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"An Aquarius, A Libra, and...
by ThadicalRadical
Date: October 27, 2011
Hits: 80
Hearts: 5
Heartrate: 7% -
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"The Girl The City" Review
by ThadicalRadical
Date: November 18, 2011
Hits: 52
Hearts: 4
Heartrate: 8% -
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"Shelter, Part II" Review
by ThadicalRadical
Date: December 01, 2011
Hits: 42
Hearts: 3
Heartrate: 8% -
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Savannah Moon Review *MM m...
by melismayhem
Date: November 04, 2011
Hits: 49
Hearts: 3
Heartrate: 7% -
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"My Impending bliss" Revie...
by ThadicalRadical
Date: November 08, 2011
Hits: 87
Hearts: 3
Heartrate: 4% -
"The Fragments of Pastor J...
by ThadicalRadical
Date: November 10, 2011
Hits: 60
Hearts: 3
Heartrate: 5% -
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"ALL (Short Story Version)...
by ThadicalRadical
Date: November 14, 2011
Hits: 84
Hearts: 3
Heartrate: 4% -
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