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"When one door closes, another one opens."

Really? How about when ten different doors slam in your face and you're left standing in an empty hallway with nothing but your self-doubt? Suffocating nothingness that only serves to damage your calm even further than the resounding click of locks, keeping you out of all those missed opportunities. There are only so many times you can hear the words 'life goes on' before you stop believing them, convincing yourself that no, it really can't get worse than this, and no, there is no way back up when you've reached rock bottom.

Yeah, I remember loss. I remember how empty I felt after you said goodbye without any emotion, how cold every part of me turned when they told me to hand in the keys, how that thing I sometimes call my soul got crushed with the news that he was gone without any kind of warning. Loss after loss after loss.

It's like having the ground ripped out from underneath you, a crowd of people watching as you trip and fall and fall and fall with nothing to reach out for, nobody there to catch you at the bottom. You wouldn't want anyone down there anyway, nobody deserves that. It's not like they would understand. Nobody could possibly understand that pain, and we're all better off that way.

Loss is different, for everyone. It can punch you square in the chest, or slap you hard across the face. You can dread it for days, weeks, months before it actually happens, or it can completely take you by surprise. It can make you feel angry, or sad, or pathetic, or hopeless, or helpless, or defeated, or jaded, or all of those things...

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