Fake Histories: Skinny Jeans
Not a lot of people know this, but the skinny jeans fad is, in fact, the unexpected consequence of a top secret military experiment gone wrong.
In the mid noughties, a group of so-called 'desirables' were kidnapped by secret forces in the dead of night and taken to an underground bunker in the Antarctic.
One such desirable was a renowned hipster, celebrated for her witty blog, asymmetrical fringe and quirky fashion sense. The government wished to harness the boundless power of this famed hipster in a manner most devious and despicable.
Operation Gene-Shrink's aim was to distil the very DNA of the It girl and other desirables to create a race of Nietzsche inspired ubermensch, artificially accelerating the speed of evolution in a direction of their choosing.
However, a laboratory miscalculation led to an embarrassing and unforeseen side-effect. After the procedure, the hipster's trousers seemed to have diminished in size. The once flared ends fit snugly around the twenty-something's slender ankles.
It wasn't until weeks later that the cause of this unusual anomaly was revealed. A rookie lab technician had, instead of choosing the 'gene-shrink' setting on the DNA-atron - had selected 'jean-shrink'- a simple mistake, but with far-reaching consequences.
Once the hipster was eventually released - her skintight denims were immediately hailed as the next big thing and emulated globally by eager copycat fans.
As for the government's dastardly experiment, a few minor adjustments and the project was back on track, so keep a steely eye on that shiny, happy generation just below you - for they might just be the manufactured children of Operation Gene-Shrink...
In the mid noughties, a group of so-called 'desirables' were kidnapped by secret forces in the dead of night and taken to an underground bunker in the Antarctic.
One such desirable was a renowned hipster, celebrated for her witty blog, asymmetrical fringe and quirky fashion sense. The government wished to harness the boundless power of this famed hipster in a manner most devious and despicable.
Operation Gene-Shrink's aim was to distil the very DNA of the It girl and other desirables to create a race of Nietzsche inspired ubermensch, artificially accelerating the speed of evolution in a direction of their choosing.
However, a laboratory miscalculation led to an embarrassing and unforeseen side-effect. After the procedure, the hipster's trousers seemed to have diminished in size. The once flared ends fit snugly around the twenty-something's slender ankles.
It wasn't until weeks later that the cause of this unusual anomaly was revealed. A rookie lab technician had, instead of choosing the 'gene-shrink' setting on the DNA-atron - had selected 'jean-shrink'- a simple mistake, but with far-reaching consequences.
Once the hipster was eventually released - her skintight denims were immediately hailed as the next big thing and emulated globally by eager copycat fans.
As for the government's dastardly experiment, a few minor adjustments and the project was back on track, so keep a steely eye on that shiny, happy generation just below you - for they might just be the manufactured children of Operation Gene-Shrink...
