The episode starts with a disaster/end-of-the-world/monster movie feel. Some military types are in a control center during some sort of crisis. The room is full of radar and flashing screens. A siren is blaring and emergency lights flashing.
An old, war hardened Commander sits in his commander's chair. He is stoic and unflinching. He is wearing his military uniform and a pair of aviator sunglasses. He is cool and collected while everyone else around him is in a panic.
Private, what intel do we have on the situation?
Sir, we don't know what it is, but it's HUGE and has enormous destruction potential.
At this point, various personnel add intel about the creature. They'd all be variations of yo mama jokes, but in a totally serious tone.
Commander, we finally have a visual. It's...it's....
The Commander leans forward to look at the screen. He removes his sunglasses. His stoic face finally cracks under the sheer terror.
May the Lord have mercy on us all.
Title Screen - RE: YOUR MOM
These are both similar ideas so I thought I'd lump them together.
RE: SECRETS We open on a woman arriving late to a dinner with her new boyfriend and his parents, whom she has yet to meet. She apologises for being late and sits at the table but awkwardly has to make room for her entourage of secrets that have accompanied her. For eg, there is a version of her wearing a tight leather bondage outfit (her 'dirty little secret'), a suave looking douche-bag of a man (her 'secret affair'), an obnoxious teenage punk chick, smoking, spitting, swearing (her 'embarrassing past secret'), and so on...
We then see the boyfriend extremely embarrassed while his parents interrogate her secrets and try to find out all they can about her.
Awkward hilarity ensues.
RE: THE FUTURE Sort of similar to above but this time a young obnoxious, know-it-all man sits at a bar drinking heavily and telling the other male patrons all about how he's going to "change the world" and how he'll "never end up in a place like this when he's old". We also notice he has a distinguishable feature (perhaps a scar, or large mole, or bright red hair). The other male patrons look embarrassed for him and try to talk him out of whatever he's planning. It's then we notice that they all have that same distinguishable feature, and are all just older versions of him at the various stages of his life, including the bartender.
I imagine a funny, and poignant back and forth dialogue between all these men while the youngest version doesn't listen to a word they say. We could perhaps finish with a grumpy 70 year old version telling...
We could bring fire to the episode by showing the harrowing acts that Prometheus(one of the original Titans) undertook to steal fire from the Greek/Roman mythological gods---for his efforts humanity was able to advance and progress and Prometheus ended up chained to a rock for all of eternity while the massive eagle of Zeus pecked out his innards everyday only to have the regrow to be plucked out tomorrow!
I imagine a very beautiful animation of him speeding through the sky like a comet risking the perils of each of the gods. Zeus with his thunderbolts, Apollo and Artemis with their bows and arrows, Aphrodite with her seduction, Ares and Athena with their swords and shields, Hermes racing after him with his winged sandals...let's be honest Dionysus is probably too drunk to do much...Poseidon sending a huge gush of water to knock him out of the sky etcetc And finally as he speeds closer to the ancient cities and touches the world lightly with the fire, we see a flickr of lights spread across humanity (much like the modern depictions of electricity use as seen from space nowadays).
VISUAL ARTISTS: Contribute Visuals of your Season 2 Cold Open ideas.